Sunday, February 2, 2014

Dog School Humiliation

I was pretty juiced up when Momma said we were going back to doggie school. I love doggie school. Plenty of noms and fun. 

When I arrived, there were three other doggies there and you know what? They were all playing with giant balls!

Running and yelling and having a grand time. You can bet I was pulling on my string and really wanting to get into the action. Balls! Chasing! Barking! You bet.

So imagine my dismay when I was ushered into a corner and given, not happy giant ball, fun times good stuff, but...

A traffic cone,

a yogurt lid (not even a trace of yogurty goodness),

a yellow square (or maybe it was orange, orange being both a color and a foodable, but I'm not allowed to eat oranges, but I do eat apples which are sometimes red, but also green or yellow or... OK, back to the story),

and an empty jar.

A joke, perhaps? Sadly, no, because while the other doggies were yipping and yelling and chasing, here is what yours truly did...

  1. Touch the yogurty goodness lid with my snooter. No problem with that. I've been doing that since I was a wee pup.
  2. Run around the traffic cone. Old news. I run around stuff all the time. However yesterday momma was waving her arms and saying words and sometimes I got a cookie and sometimes I didn't.
  3. Barfed. Yeah, well, when one is consuming good dog foodables at a rapid pace, stuff happens (but momma let me clean it up myself, so no worries, just as good the second time around).
  4. Then the yellow (or orange) square appeared behind the cone and just when I was getting really speedy with the whole "run around the cone" thing, she starts saying "RIGHT THERE!" when I'm behind the cone. Sheesh. Sometimes when she said that I ran to her because I thought she might be broken and other times I froze in place because it was almost scary voice. When I froze I got a cookie thrown at me which I had to chase down. That part was fun.
  5. Finally, Trainer Dude put an empty jar on the floor. I  investigated it, but I had no idea what to do and momma was doing that creepy quiet stare at me until I figure it out thing. So I did some spins and rolls and sits and looked very labradorable, but no noms.

And that was it. I'm not sure what to make of it. All I know is that we brought the empty jar home along with some paper with words about "homework." Maybe next time it will all make sense.

I went to doggie school and all I got was this stupid jar.

Dexter done!

P.S. From Mango Momma. 
We started a Treibball class, otherwise known as "urban herding." If you don't know what that is, just search on YouTube or watch this short video. There were three other dog / handler pairs in the class. They'd all done the beginner class already, so they were working their dogs with balls and goal posts. 

Before Dexter can start working with balls, there are a few skills he needs to master:

  1. Being sent out to an object (and I need to learn which hand and which command to use depending on the direction of approach I want).
  2. Positioning himself behind an object and holding still.
  3. Pushing with his nose.
The nose push was the hardest for him so we were sent home with a practice object. 

My main objective in signing up for this class was to get Dexter used to working at a distance. I think it will help build his confidence. Right now, he really crowds me when we're training. Plus, we haven't been to school in a while and I've always found dog school is a great way to strengthen the bond between dog and handler. Oh, and Fi and Abby's momma told me to (always listen to your crazy dog lady pals).


  1. One of our local dog schools has a Treiball class and we've thought of giving it a try. Now we're really intrigued! We love training and think we have an amazing bond because of it, but when we're not taking a class and doing structured training, we don't always practice. Have fun!

  2. I'll admit, I had no idea what any of those things had to do with Treibball! Then when I saw you explain at the bottom, it kind of made sense. I wonder if Riley would like something like that...she is a herding dog, however, she has practically zero herding instincts! I don't even know if there's anywhere in our area that does Treibball training...hmm.

    Elyse (and Riley)

  3. It'll get better, Dexter! I'm trying to talk Stumpy into joining you when return.

  4. Whoah Dex....that sounds like OK, so maybe it sounds like it might be fun eventually?? Hang in there dude, enjoy the least you get quality time with the Mama right???


    PeeEss...we are great believers in the second time around is just as good as the first!!

  5. Gosh Dexter that sounds like very advanced stuff.
    Although are you absolutely sure that is a traffic cone and not a dunce's hat….?
    Toodle pip!

  6. Oooh. We know that stare; it sounds like neither of our Moms have learned ANYTHING from Star Trek - if you want us to read your minds, you have to let us do a Vulcan Mind Meld. Simply staring doesn't exactly do anything. At least you are going to doggie class. Our Mom stopped by to see our doggie trainer yesterday and they decided (don't we get a vote in this?!?) that they would 'hold off until spring'. Gee. Thanks. We are sure you are going to get the hang of all of this - if your Mom can actually learn to communicate what she wants, that is. And if you don't get the hang of it, well, blame OUR Mom - clearly she has been dispensing advice on the interwebs without a license again! ;-)

    *kissey face*
    -Fiona and Abby the Hippobottomus

  7. Maybe your DOH needs a Siberian -

    Just sayin'

    PeeEssWoo: BTW, REALLY????? ;-)

  8. WOW DEXTER.... we have never "HERD" of this one before. It sounds super FUN. Can't wait to hear more about this.

  9. I got the impression that your momma supported my decision to stop thinking, but now she's trying to teach you some crazy moves that require every ounce of brain power you can muster yet will have no application in the real world. Tell her to sign you up for Squirrel Chasing 101.

  10. hello dexter its dennis the vizsla dog hay i hav not tried treibball myself wel unless yoo kownt the time mama had me bopping a big ball with my nose but nobody heer had eeven herd of treibball at that point so i dont think it kownts but ennyway i am not familyar with the roolz and sutch but i good gess the empty jar wuz so yoo cud submit a sampel for bannd substanse testing!!! yoo no for performanse enhansers sutch as stella and chewys or frosty paws!!! after the hole lanse armstrong debakul i heer they ar krakking down evryware!!! ok bye

  11. sounds like way to much work for nothing more than a bare wiff of a yogurt lid

  12. OMD! How confusing. But sounds like you did a bang-up job trying to make sense of it all while all the others got to have FUN! Sheesh!

    XXXOOO Daisy, Bella & Roxy

  13. Dex, Loki is totally JELLY. He wishes his DOH would get off the sofa and do some work like they used to do together. He's wondering, can he come live with you so he can have funballs time again?

  14. This sounds like some kind of crazy thing Dad and Küster would do! I have no idea what humans are thinking sometimes. Dexter, I nominate you for sainthood!


  15. Dexter,

    Your post had my human doubled over laughing when she watched the YouTube video. You see here in New Zealand border collies round up live sheep, not pieces of dead plastic like she has just learnt dogs do in America. We had never seen that before!

    Good luck working out what you are meant to do, and only do it if you are given enough food as a reward.


  16. You're going to school, Dexter? We bet lunch period is awesome! :)

  17. Howdy Dex. Looks like the ball chasing will be fun once your Momma knows what to do. Is she hard to train??? I, Stella, once chased balls like that. Actually they were sheep. In a paddock. I was great at it and mum said I was a right little witch (but with a B) so we were both right hehe. Have fun mate. We think you will be a star student cause your sissy Raja was fabo with a ball right? No worries, and love, Stella and Rory

  18. Herding??? A Labradude?? Okays, well I thinks that could be funs! Ma had a Old English Sheepdog that used to herd everyone, and Ma thought it was just annoyin', butts I don't think she sees what fun it can be pushin' peeps around!! BOL
    I knows, this is different, butts in your spare time.....
    Ruby ♥

  19. We've never heard about Treibball before. We hope it gets to be more fun for you, Dexter. The first day is always the hardest!

    Love ya lots♥
    Mitch and Molly

  20. We have seen that Treiball game Dexter but we haven't tried it. Lots of our dog friends really enjoy it. It is always fun to go to school though and learn new things and get lots of treats are good too. Ambrose particularly likes the predigested ones that you created! Have fun. We are sure that when your momma gets the hang of it, you will be a Treiball star!

  21. I like your story, and i like your black dog picture

  22. That is some nutty training but at least treats were involved

  23. I'm with Lily. If treats were involved, there's always that.

  24. Haha - sounds like fun! I've wanted to try it but we don't have any training out here for it. l look forward to seeing Dexter progress.

    Monty and Harlow

  25. What the???? I got very confused sniffing at your blogpost. I had to go take a nap and come back to finish sniffing about it.
    Urban herding, hmmmm, going to herd your momma? Just asking....


  26. Dude, you were robbed! Plain and simple. Robbed!!!

  27. Sounds like super duper fun! Don't worry - Dexter - As a member of the smartest breed ever, you'll have this figured out very soon!

  28. Eeeeeeeeeeeew at the second helpings thing. We hope you have fun Dex. As cats, we're a bit baffled at your idea of fun. Have you thought of just swiping the treat box???

  29. Sounds like your trip was much more productive than mine have ever been. I jokingly call Elsie (my shorthair) a Dog Obedience Drop out. She pooped on the floor, refused to walk on her leash and just wanted to play with the giant Mountain Bernese dog standing next to us. Granted she was still in a puppy mode. Maybe if I took her back she would be much better at it.

  30. You'll learn the jar thing right away and then you can has crazy mad fun with the balls right?
    I hope you enjoy the trieball, we never gets any unusual sports to try here.
    ~lickies, Ludo

  31. I am so excited you're learning a new sport!!!

  32. Gosh, Dex! That is very confusing. I don't have any good advice for you other than enjoy those treats...first and second time! Mom says she finds this to be very interesting and had never heard of it before.

  33. Well....maybe it will be fun once you get the hang of it???? Gives you something to do anyway!!

  34. No worries Dexter, you will be furst in your class in no time!

    Woofs and Licks,
    Maggie Mae and Max

  35. You are doing what? I will have to look this up. How is that crazy dog lady me has never heard of this? LOL Looks like we are all going back to school: Hermione is entering obedience classes and Roscoe is starting on Rally O. Great minds think alike. :D

  36. All you got was an EMPTY jar? Life's not fair. I hope Momma's planning to add cookies to it. That must be it. She just hasn't gotten to the cookie store yet.

  37. Dexter, school looks pretty hard. I think you did great so far. Will you be getting a report card?? I hope you get good grades and lots more cookies and cheese. I agree with you the cookies taste just as good the second time, sometimes better since they are all chewed up and soft.

    Loveys Sasha

  38. We watched that video. Those black and white things aren't doggies. Now we want to learn something new :-(

    -Bart, Ruby and Otto