Friday, November 16, 2012

A Celebration of Slobber



Sometimes I wonder why humans can't just let doggies be themselves. So many doggies with cropped ears and docked tails and other cosmetic surgeries that long ago crossed the line from utilitarian into fashion.

But what really irks yours truly is when feckless humans bring home doggies and then are surprised, dismayed, dare I say, repulsed when their furry friends shed, track mud indoors, and, yes, even SLOBBER! 

My friends, Sherman and Leroy, recently alerted me to an abomination that is euphemistically called the "Slobber Stopper." As difficult as it is to believe, there are simpletons out there who bring home gigantic flapping flewed monster dogs and then despair when generous portions of slobber are part of the package.

What is a "Slobber Stopper?" I am posting the photo below in small size as just seeing it causes me to shudder because it is nothing more than a muzzle. Oh, turn away.


This is seriously misguided and abusive towards our big slobbery pals. Sherman and Leroy posted an eloquent chastisement of the product that you can read here

Which brings me to the topic of the day, that being that Sherman and Leroy have declared today "National Slobber Appreciation Day." 

To help me celebrate, I am bringing out some archival photos of my brother, Mango the Relentlessly Huge, who was big, simple, sometimes fun, sometimes a bully, and, yes, always forever a champion of slobber.

I am particularly fond of this picture as it reminds me not just of the artfully viscous stringers that he constantly sported, but also of his annoying habit of presenting his lipstick in most images. But, as he always said, "It's all Mango.... it's all good."




And who could forget the full out facial highlighting of fun time slobbering?





Admittedly, yours truly could often be found sporting some Mango overflow. I was never terribly bothered. That's the thing of it. Dogs don't think slobber is nasty. So why should their humans?





Even Mango sometimes managed to use slobber as art on his absurdly large head.





Don't think for a minute that your narrator is not capable of some discrete slingers himself. You might need to bigify, but I've got a darn good labradroolcicle going here.





Sure, I'm not really able to match the foamy, adhesive goo of a mastiff, but I can get some impressive drips going on occasion.





In conclusion, dogs are to be celebrated in their full dogginess, slobber and all.

Dexter done!

P.S. Do you want to sign a petition to put a stop to the Slobber Stopper forever? Just click this link.

32 comments:

  1. Well said Dexter.

    It couldn't have been a dog lover who thought up a Slobber Stopper . We say the stupid people who make them should be made to wear them. See how they like it.

    Have a grrrreat weekend Dexter.

    Molly, Taffy, Monty and Winnie

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  2. VERY well said! Excellent post, my friend! You articulated our thoughts exactly - let dogs be dogs, in all their dogginess. We love the classic Mango shot, with slobber AND lipstick, as well as your other cool drool photos. (No doubt your mom has a file called "slobber" in addition to the "Dexter's bottom photos" file.)

    Happy Slobber Appreciation Day!

    your pal,
    Garth

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  3. That is one thing I have always loved about Australia ...we banned ear and tail cropping years ago. De clawing of cats is banned and slobber flows freely. Lets dogs and cats be dogs and cats and NOT a in convenience to our human life styles

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  4. Very well said, Dexter! Some people are just plainly brainless and vain.

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  5. Slobber happens -- humans should just learn to live with it! Loved seeing the pictures of Mango! Good memories!

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  6. We saw that monstrosity over at Sherman and Leroy's....looks cruel. If humans don't like a dog's traits....don't get that kind of dog. Easy. We thought of Mango today as it's mango season here.

    XXXOOO Daisy, bella & Roxy

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  7. Yuh. Mom isn't thrilled by excessive slobber, but that's why we are in the house rather than some jowly slobbery beast. Mom knows her slobber limitations and live with it. That said, whenever we are in doggie class with slobbery dogs, Mom is always ooohing and aaaahing (while privately telling us that she couldn't deal with that much slobber on daily basis). But duh, if you don't like slobber, don't get a slobbery dog (we might slobber a wee bit, but only when steaks are being grilled and Mom totally gets that). I mean, really - it's not rocket science. Love the classic Mango photo - I think that captures the essence of the RH - slobber, lipstick, and a generally goofy happiness with the world. Love it! And while our Mom whines about mud, she just mops a lot, and throws a lot of towels on the bed during mud season. Humans are adaptable that way! ;-)

    *kissey face*
    -Fiona and Abby the Hippobottomus

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  8. OMC - that really exists??? How dumb is that? If you don't want the slobber or the mess, don't get a dog! And be prepared to miss out on all the joy and the love. Mom says after transporting several bloodhounds in the Beetle, she is pretty sure the back seat is being held together by drool. We suppose there is a product for everything, but that one is just bad!!!

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  9. LOL - we support slobber! We've slipped, slid, had things glued to us with it, and have proudly worn it to work! :D

    Sam

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  10. Because people put their needs before the pups. Let dogs be dogs!

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  11. I wish me and Dave could slobber!
    Play bows,
    Zim

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  12. Oh my goodness, your brother Mango was a master, Dex. That MUZZLE is wicked and I hope it gets taken off the shelves. I'm sure a slobbery dog NEEDS to open his mouth so he can breathe better. There are a couple of huge slobbery dogs here too. Their humans carry little towels to the park so they can wipe off anyone who's been slobbered LOL.

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  13. Thanks for spreading the word about this terrible product Dexter and thanks for joining in on Slobber Appreciation Day! Mr. Mango sure did know how to let the slobber fly and seeing his slobbers again brought tears to my eyes!

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  14. I miss Thor and Mango! Slobber and Slime go along with the mastiff, and with the Newfie (several of my in=laws were owned by one or more Newfies). Like I told Sherman and Leroy, if you don't want a mess from a dog, get a teacup Yorkie. A bite sized dog can't leave any mess, because it almost doesn't exist.

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  15. How can anyone not adore slobber? It is just so appealing and artistic!

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  16. OMD!! THE HORRORS!!! I can't believe peeps would even thinks of puttin' THAT on their pooch!! Now, when Ma got me, she had NO IDEA that I, perfect MOI, would have a slobber problem. Airedale?? Slobber like a Mastiff??? Oh, yes my friend! Okays, maybe not as bad as a Mastiff...but PRETTY DARN CLOSE! So even with the surprise of a Mastiff mouth on an Airedale, Ma would NEVER even THINK of stoppin it with a torture contraption such as that! Listen, a hand towel works just fine. (Not that Ma still doesn't do the occasional "Ewwww"...it's a process!) BOL

    Kisses,
    Ruby

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  17. Tori loves slobbering

    Stop on by for a visit
    Kari
    http://www.dogisgodinreverse.com

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  18. Lol - fond memories of Mango for sure!

    Sadly, Blueberry cannot compete with the champion droolers. :) Yes, let's just let dogs be dogs. They drool, they roll in gross things and think they smell fabulous, they dig, and they always, always worm their way into our hearts. Thank God for dogs! :)

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  19. We Beaglebratz think that slobber stopper thingy iz just sooooooo not rite. We're thinkin'like a lot of the otherz - if sumone don't like slobber than don't git a dog that slobberz - eezy-peezy answer tue that problem. Mom just signed a petishun AGAINST de-barkin! Cood u imagine a Beagle WITHOUT it'z bayin'sound - TOTALLY UNNATCHURAL! An'we ask u - just what iz so wrong with a little dog hair or a little noze art? If God had waanted us that way then He wooda MADE us that way! THE DOGGIEZ OF BLOGVILLE UNITE - DUE WE NEED A REVOLUSHUN????????
    OK - time fur a late afternoon nap now b-4 they take that away tue!
    Shiloh'n The DIVA Shasta

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  20. What a horrible contraption! The poor doggie can't even open his mouth! Drooling and slobber is a fact of life!

    Love ya lots,
    Mitch and Molly

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  21. Don't like that at all Dexter. Signed it! Now sometimes a muzzle is necessary for safety reasons, but I don't like those either even if we had had to use them with our larger dogs at the vet. I have a feeling that Mango could have slobbered through that thing anyway. Thanks for the enlightenment. Ann

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  22. We're cats, Dexter, and even we know that slobber is good!!! We support slobber 100%!!!

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  23. I loves to slobber cept mums says I drowl not slobber but Ailsa she used to leave puddles if foods was around I skidded in them sometimes, people shouldnt have us doggies if they want everything neat and dry. we going to sign partition, thats just a muzzle in disguse and they bads enough

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  24. Signed!! Thank you Dexter!!

    Your Pal,

    Miss Fendi HoneyBuzz

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  25. Totally right Dexter. Let dogs be dogs. Even slobber ones. Well done you.
    Toodle pip!
    Bertie.

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  26. Howdy Dexter. A Slobber Stopper?? In the words of Uncle Mango, WTF? As you know, mum has lived in a house of slobber for many many years and yes, that is why she looks so darn good. The amount of slobber she has rubbed into her skin has kept the wrinkles at bay. We say celebrate slobber in all its forms, dangly, drooly, sticky and Rory's favourite, the shake the head and share slobber. We're glad to see Dexter, that you too enjoy a slobber every now and then. Thanks for the photos of Uncle Mango. We miss him.
    No worries, and love, Stella and Rory

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  27. A Slobber Stopper?? The horror of it all - yes we are against it. We Scotties don't slobber or if we do, you can't see it because it stays in our handy-dandy beards, but our late Labridude, Java could string it out pretty good. We think "if you don't like slobber, get a chihuahua and leave the good big dogs for everyone else".

    XOXO
    Lilly, Piper, Ivy and The Sweet Buglets

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  28. Yikes! Is that even legal? It must violate the Doggie Bill of Rights. We're not slobbery [unless we're sick], but mama spent a lifetime with Danes before us. Good times. Good times.

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  29. Mabel is funny... she does not mind her own slobber but when one of her friends slobbers on her... she runs over and is like, "Mooooom! Get it off me!"

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  30. Great Posty Dexter! I has natural ear and I think they are most handsome! Also, I am a proud slobberer!

    woof - Tucker

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  31. Been there, signed the petition against such a ridiculously cruel invention to contain slobbers. I think this post did an exceptional job of magnifyin' the beauty of excess mouth droolage. Sumtimes the stupidity of the 2 legger race astounds this Big Brown hound.

    Woofs and astoundin' slobbers,
    Chester ;0=)

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